not so beautiful

I kinda want black nail polish. I actually hate nail polish, I don’t own any, but I can’t help it.

I actually really don’t care for beauty products at all. That doesn’t mean I’m dirty, but I really don’t care that much. I wear make up and I use facial products but it’s not like I try new stuff.

I know a ton of people who use different products pretty much every week, because the are looking for the perfect one that will make their hair shine and their skin smooth and perfect or whatever. I really just use the same stuff all the time.

The only time I try something new, is when my sister tells me this or that is really awesome or she has THE solution for my problem :grin:

Maybe when I feel really girly and bored I’ll write a post about the products I use.

Till then I’m going to continue to listen to some cheesy 90ies music, have a headache and wait for my sis so we can watch The Big Bang Theory.

at the moment…

…I have a headache. Actually since yesterday. I went to see Shutter Island anyway. It was good, but I had expected more, especially since everyone was talking about how scary it was. It wasn’t.

    Things I’m into at the moment:

  • Caprica I liked the show pretty much since episode one…or more like episode zero, the DVD pilot. It incorporates a lot of topics that I find interesting in science fiction, so that’s great. You can watch it without knowing anything about Battlestar Galactica, too. I’ve seen a lot of the original BSG series, and of course the whole 2004 reboot, so it’s cool to see some of the blanks being filled in by Caprica. (I know there is a difference between the original BSG series and the new one, so no lectures please). However while it is a prequel to BSG, Caprica can absolutely stand on its own. It’s almost a whole different story, but not exactly. Anyway, you need to watch it to know what I mean…
  • Undamaged roofs Yesterday the ceiling in my room had a little water problem. All of a sudden water started dripping down. It stopped, so it’s ok for now, but if it’s starts again they might need to open the ceiling, because one of the tiles might be broken. I don’t want my room to turn into a construction site again! So please, no water dripping from the ceiling anymore!!!
  • Highway 61 Revisited by Bob Dylan I think I wrote about this CD a few weeks ago. I still think it’s really good, and I still think the songs are too long…I mean Desolation Row is 11 minutes. The average song on that album is about 5 minutes long. It’s a bit difficult to really pay attention to one song that long without getting bored with it…)

Ok, I think I’ll go and take something against the headache now. It’s been a while since I had one this persistent…

the friendship factor

Before I start this little rant, I got a formspring account (yeah, talk about jumping on the band wagon…). You can ask stuff, but I won’t promise actually answering.

Ok~, so when I was still in high school or maybe the beginning of university a friend said something to me that I remember quite frequently lately:

Said friend was over and saw a music magazine on my table and said: So you are one of those now? I didn’t ask her to elaborate, but I felt a little offended. When she said that, it sounded like she wanted to imply that I woke up that morning and just decided that music was going to be my “thing”, like she felt it was pretentious of me to have that magazine.

The reason I remembered was, that I met her on the train last week. A year or two ago she moved away because of work and never gave me her new contact info, which to me looked like she didn’t care for me being in her new life. So meeting her was a complete coincidance. She could have easily contacted me, since I still live in the same place and my phone numbers are still the same, but she didn’t, so her choice.

However meeting and talking to her after a long time gave me the distance to name something that always bothered me about her. Whenever she was telling me something, like what happened on her holiday or with her family, or anything that happened without me present really, it kinda felt like she was lying.

I know she wasn’t completely lying, but definitely dramatizing. How every little trouble in her family always sounded like a mafia feud or how guys asked her to marry her… it never really felt like the truth.

I asked her for her phone number because it seemed like the polite thing to do, seeing how we used to be good friends, but to be honest I don’t actually plan on calling or messaging her.

I’m just really over trying to find or keep friends. To be honest I mostly didn’t like the people who were my friends that much. Having friends always ends up with me having to compromise or being less of me on account of someone else, and I’m done with that. Have been for a few years actually.

There is this line in a Nada Surf song: “They say if you’re not lonely alone, boy there is something wrong.” It was pretty freeing when I decided at about 17 that nothing was wrong about it.

And that was a new episode of the inner workings of Nicola! Ha, whatever I’ll go to bed!

pulling a fast one

Ok, I have exactly ten minutes for this post!

I actually can’t believe I got all the stuff done that I wanted to do after work, I’ve only been here for about 1 ½ h

I did overtime again today; The new semester starts on the 15th, pretty much everyone is going crazy. We have a huge load of stuff to do till then. It’s funny cause as a student you never actually see how much work it takes, but now that I’m on the other side it’s really way more than you’d expect. (for first time readers: I work at a university)

aah~ my sis is coming in, we are going to watch Germany’s next Top Model now~~

back to how it was

Before I actually started typing I still had something I wanted to write about…

Anyway, I decided to scrap the rest of the meme or rather I decided to not continue, as the only left over props were either endless rants or stuff I don’t really think about (eg. hopes and dreams for ‘10).

So from now on I’m going to continue with my usual few line nonsensical ramblings.

Now that I think about it, I do have things to write about, but I think it’s more stuff that should be in my diary, not that it’s deep or anything (ha! right, deep…not on my watch, never!), just stuff that’s on my mind.

Also lately I have this kind of underlying feeling of irritation. It’s like a huge stack of books and the one lying on the very bottom is irritation. It feels like it’s hidden under a ton of normal feelings and even happy feelings. I can’t really explain why I should be annoyed, I really have no reason at all. I don’t act on it either or am bitchy, on the contrary I’m in an all right to good mood, but still.

Like I said, stuff for my diary…

However, won’t write today, because I had to do overtime and I’ve been home for only 3:45 hours and it’s already time for bed.

Look at that, a blog post about a diary entry… des is scho fast doppelt gemoppelt (pardon my bavarian XD).